Using Monetary Rewards for ARFID in a 12-Year-Old: A Cautious Approach
I would not recommend using monetary rewards as a primary intervention for your son's ARFID, as this approach lacks evidence-based support and could potentially increase pressure and anxiety, particularly given his co-occurring OCD and possible PDA. Instead, prioritize evidence-based behavioral therapies specifically designed for ARFID, which address the underlying mechanisms of food avoidance without adding performance pressure.
Why Monetary Rewards Are Problematic for ARFID
The Core Issue: ARFID Is Not About Motivation
ARFID is fundamentally different from typical picky eating—it involves genuine fear of adverse consequences from eating, sensory sensitivities to food properties, or lack of interest in eating that leads to nutritional deficiencies and psychosocial impairment 1. Your son's avoidance of lunch foods isn't a choice he's making that needs external motivation; it's driven by one or more of these underlying mechanisms 2.
Adding monetary incentives could backfire in several ways:
Increased anxiety and pressure: Children with ARFID often have co-occurring anxiety disorders, and your son's OCD makes this particularly concerning 3, 4. Token economies work for ADHD-related behavioral issues like task completion and following rules 5, but eating when you have genuine food-related fears or sensory aversions is not analogous to these behaviors.
PDA complications: If your son has pathological demand avoidance, external pressure—even positive incentives—can trigger avoidance responses and make the problem worse 3.
Guilt and shame: As you wisely noted, if he "fails" to earn the money despite trying, this could reinforce feelings of inadequacy and worsen his relationship with food 1.
What the Evidence Actually Supports
Evidence-Based Treatment for ARFID
The recommended approach for ARFID involves cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and/or family-based therapy (FBT), not reward systems 1, 2. These therapies work by:
- Gradually exposing children to feared or avoided foods in a supportive, low-pressure environment
- Addressing the specific ARFID subtype (fear-based, sensory-based, or lack of interest)
- Teaching coping strategies for anxiety around food
- Involving the family in creating a supportive mealtime environment
The ADHD Treatment Context
While behavioral interventions with token economies are strongly recommended for ADHD in 12-year-olds 5, 6, these are designed for behaviors like completing homework, following classroom rules, and reducing impulsivity—not for addressing eating disorders 5. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends FDA-approved ADHD medications combined with behavioral interventions for children ages 6-12 6, but these behavioral interventions target ADHD symptoms, not feeding disorders.
A Better Approach: Structured Steps Forward
Step 1: Seek Specialized ARFID Assessment
Your son needs evaluation by a clinician experienced in ARFID 1, 2. This should include:
- Comprehensive assessment of which ARFID subtype(s) he has (fear-based, sensory-based, or lack of interest)
- Screening for nutritional deficiencies given his limited daytime intake 1, 4
- Evaluation of the interaction between his ARFID, ADHD, OCD, and possible PDA 3, 4
Children with ARFID commonly have multiple co-occurring neurodevelopmental and psychiatric conditions—in fact, 21% of autistic individuals and their families show avoidant-restrictive features, and anxiety and OCD are particularly common comorbidities 3, 4.
Step 2: Implement Evidence-Based Therapy
Cognitive behavioral therapy specifically adapted for ARFID is the first-line treatment 1, 2. This might include:
- Gradual exposure therapy: Systematically introducing new foods in a hierarchy from least to most anxiety-provoking, without pressure to eat
- Sensory-based interventions: If sensory sensitivities are driving his avoidance, working with an occupational therapist experienced in feeding
- Family-based therapy: Restructuring family mealtime dynamics to reduce pressure and anxiety 1
Step 3: Address the Lunch Problem Pragmatically
While working on the underlying ARFID, you need immediate solutions for school lunch:
- Work with the school: Request accommodations through his IEP or 504 plan (which he should have for ADHD) 5, 6 to allow him to eat foods he currently accepts, even if unconventional
- Identify any currently acceptable portable foods: Even if limited, start with what he will eat rather than pushing new foods
- Consider nutritional supplementation: Discuss with his physician whether nutritional drinks or supplements are needed given his daytime restriction 1
Why This Matters More Than You Might Think
The High Stakes of Untreated ARFID
Untreated ARFID can lead to serious medical complications including malnutrition, growth impairment, and reliance on enteral feeding 1, 2. Children with ARFID also have substantially increased risks of multiple medical conditions and significantly longer hospital stays compared to children without ARFID 4. Your concern is absolutely justified, but the solution needs to address the root cause, not just incentivize behavior change.
The Chronic Nature of Both Conditions
Both ADHD and ARFID require ongoing management as chronic conditions 5, 6. The American Academy of Pediatrics emphasizes that ADHD treatment should follow principles of the chronic care model with continuous, coordinated care 6. Similarly, feeding difficulties in children with neurodevelopmental conditions frequently persist into adolescence and adulthood 3, making early, appropriate intervention critical.
Common Pitfalls to Avoid
Don't assume this is just "picky eating" that motivation can fix: ARFID is a distinct eating disorder with specific treatment needs 1, 2, 7
Don't delay seeking specialized help: The longer ARFID goes untreated, the more entrenched patterns become and the higher the risk of medical complications 1, 4
Don't apply ADHD behavioral strategies to eating disorder symptoms: Token economies work for ADHD-related behaviors but are not evidence-based for ARFID 5, 6, 1
Don't overlook the role of his other diagnoses: OCD and possible PDA significantly complicate treatment and require specialized approaches 3, 4
Your instinct to be cautious about adding pressure was correct. Instead of monetary rewards, pursue evidence-based ARFID treatment with a qualified therapist while ensuring his ADHD remains well-managed with appropriate medications and behavioral supports 6, 1.